Ever have so many things you want to do that you simply end up doing none of them? I feel like that has been me recently. Hell, I feel like that has been me for a while.
Take this blog, for example. I love to write. Scratch that. I feel like I SHOULD love to write. And, why not? I always excelled in writing during school. Hell, I minored in Professional Writing during college. That being said, I think I registered for this domain many months ago, yet this is my first post. But, just because you're good at something, does that necessarily mean you're meant to do it?
At the risk of sounding conceited -- and I honestly don't mean to -- I have been good at a lot of things as I have grown up. Until I reached the real world, I attained virtually anything I set my mind to. Math? No problem. English? Well, I'm apparently born to write. Honor Roll? Do you even need to ask? Cheerleading? Sure, why not throw that in there, too?
The problem with being good at too many things is that you end up doing nothing of particular significance. Or, at least that's my experience. I'm someone who hates the idea of multitasking. I'd much rather set my mind on one thing, complete it, then move on. I get a high off of crossing things off to-do lists. I hate clutter, and I loathe leaving things open-ended. Juggling too many things, too many expectations, induces stress to the point that I'm miserable.
So, back to the issue at hand, I don't know what to do with my life. I wish I was always good at one thing and only one thing; that would make the decision much easier. The natural question is to ask what I actually LIKE to do, and hope that that intersects somehow with something I am skilled (or potentially skilled) in doing. Well, not so much luck there either.
It's not that I don't like to do things, it's just that everything I like to do, or dream of doing, is something you're supposed to grow out of around the time you get your drivers license, possibly even earlier. Even if you're not expected to grow out of it, you're supposed to have moved your ass into gear toward it by now.
But, like I said, I sit here. Frozen.
